Hats Off to Hillary Clinton

By Bob Wilson

What a hoot watching feminists heap accolades on Hillary Clinton is! "You go girl!" Seems to be their appropriate cheer. Here's a woman's woman. Strong, independent, courageous, compassionate...Yes, she has it all.

Let's examine Hillary's accomplishments.

She was raised a privileged child, from a prominent, well-off Republican family. She was given all the advantages growing up a child could be given. (Nothing inherently wrong with that at all, but it does not necessarily give a person a "leg up" in the empathy department when it comes to understand a constituency of struggling, minority Americans, as is her claim.)

Hillary's higher education came at an expensive, Eastern, predominantly female university noted for having an extreme left wing orientation. There, she "came out" in the stereotypical 1960s radical feminist fashion her educators intended. She met her soul mate (meal ticket), while in the midst of her transformation into a left wing socialist...in the name of Bill ("I did not have sex with that woman..") Clinton.

Recognizing Bill as having the potential for a successful political career, Hillary hitched her wagon to this stud-muffin, and has not released him since. Riding this guy to the ultimate high's of prominence, she now find herself as having achieved the epitome of parasitical success. Her notable accomplishments? Turning $1,000 into $100,000 in less than one year by "investing" it in the futures market with a brokerage firm in Arkansas, while her hubby happened to be the governor... Becoming a "partner" in a law firm that swindled scores of investors in a failed land development scheme. "Losing" her billing records upon having them subpoenaed by a grand jury. Watching her "partners" get indicted by grand juries, and having one after another "associate" cop a plea, or be found guilty of felonies involving fraud. All, incidentally, attest that Hillary was only a "figurehead" in the law firm, and totally "out of the loop" when it came to culpability in the various criminal doings. (How come such a vital, strong woman is able to be "used" like that??) Whilst acting as a figurehead, Hillary used her Eastern Liberal education to help raise the educational standards in Arkansas. Realizing that education is the key to success in life, under the leadership of her meal ticket (husband) and herself, Arkansas elevated it's rank in education (verified by national test results) from 49th in the nation, to 50th.

Hillary's list of accomplishments continues. Once her "meal ticket" got himself elected to the office of President of The United States, because of her business prowess (as indicated with The Rose Law Firm, and her concern for educational standards, she was granted license (by the meal ticket) to attack the nation's newly recognized "health care crisis." As our nation's first "First Lady and Health Care Czar" she formed a committee to study the health care industry. On that committee, curiously, there were no physicians. Instead, it consisted of a group of left wing university professors and political/social engineers. Her proposal was sent to the congress (then a majority Democrat) and resoundingly defeated. Essentially, it was an attempt to nationalize 1/7th of the U.S. economy, and bring about a medical system patterned after such failed systems as once existed in the old Soviet Union.

Then, the "First Lady" wrote a book. It's title? "It Takes A Village." She toured the country touting it as the new handbook of social order regarding how children should be raised. Hillary knows a lot about this subject. She once wrote that children should have the legal right to "sue their parents" for failing to bring them up properly. Additionally, she has a child herself, so the trials and tribulations of child rearing is no mystery to her. All those diapers, the PTA, piano lessons, boy's calling...Hillary could really relate... Unfortunately, the word leaked out. The book was entirely ghost written. Even the title was stolen from another author...with not one word of acknowledgment to the real writers. OOP's!

But, give Hillary credit where it is due. No "Tammy Wynette" standing by her man, Hillary showed her strength as an independent woman when she defended her husband from "The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy" out there starting those vicious rumors (all lies of course) about Bill's philandering ways. Yes, she and "meal ticket" have had rough times in their marriage, as they confided during the 91 election campaign. As they sat holding each other's hand in an interview, some issues had brought pain to their marriage in the past, but that was long over. (I suppose raping an Arkansas retirement home owner, and ardent supporter might have been one of those painful issues long settled...or perhaps it was the many times her meal ticked had used the Arkansas highway patrol to procure women to the governor's side for a little "servicing." ) Those things were in the past however, and her marriage was vital and secure.

That White House intern program was not even a blip on the horizon at that time...but in 1997-98, it seems that there was some kind of a relapse on the part of the "meal ticket." I forget the details, but you know how that "Vast Right Wing Conspiracy" can blow (no pun intended) things out of proportion.

She stuck by her man, her marriage, and her family though, and now, it seems that these characteristics do indeed qualify her to run for The United States Senate. Let's see...born in Illinois, lived in public housing all her life, principally in Arkansas, what state should she pick to represent as a senator??? Oh, of course silly...New York.

So, why wouldn't feminists be proud? She represents the ultimate in female independence. Strong, courageous, self reliant, Hillary is the poster woman of 20th Century female accomplishments. She is Helen Keller, Betsy Ross, Rosa Parks, Madame Curie, and Joan of Arc, all in one package. Kinda brings a tear to your eyes to imagine how history will document this strong woman's rise to leadership in the annals of feminine achievement.

Bob Wilson is an Arizona pilot and businessman who writes regularly for the Ethical Spectacle.